My face is fuller

I’m in pain again, this baby growing business is no joke and people keep telling me to just wait till the third trimester when things get really ugly and I gotta day, I’m not looking forward to that because now is already crummy enough. But those weekly ultrasound appointments keep me going and baby girl is so adorable, even as a black and white wiggly blob. I’m so looking forward to snuggling her, I can tangibly feel it and my arms ache for it. It’s amazing going through all these things that I’ve heard about and now get to experience firsthand. I hope sleep helps the hips that are giving me trouble today and clears the angst of the day away. 

Remember me?

I’m feeling pretty disconnected from people. I’m in my own little bubble of secrets and sickness and this stupid medication I’ve been taking since January that’s supposed to make me better just feels like it’s making me worse. I went to therapy today which was great, but I’m so emotionally drained from airing out all my baggage. Connor is nearing the end of the semester and he’s just as worn out and tired as I am only he’s not taking nasty meds. There are so many things to be grateful for and I’m so happy I have access to a therapist I love and medications that make my body healthier. I look forward to the day when my body is perfected in Christ and I don’t have to worry about overdoing it one day because I’ll have the energy I need. I’ll be able to run without my knees feeling like they’re broken! I don’t feel like I have chronic pain and I’m so sorry for people that do, but my little body has a lot going on and I’m just tired and sad.