Missions.

My best friend has a mission call that's arriving tomorrow! Miss Morgan Potter is serving in St George, Bri is in San Diego, Megan in Rome! Devon in Fiji, Nathaniel in South Carolina, Cache in South Salt Lake. Coulson in Brazil. Avery in Brazil. Kindia in Russia. Kaci in Chile. It's an exciting time to be a member of the church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints :) 

It was time

I spent a year and a half of my life being crazy in love with this boy and now that it's over I'm relieved. I have begun my long haul to move on and am keeping myself so crazy busy that I have no time to reflect on what I've given up, but the wonderful thing is I know something infinitely better is coming along because of my trials. Heavenly Father loves me and takes care of me and looks after me and I should never be worried about what my future has in store. 

This week is crazy! I've been going nonstop for weeks! Friday afternoon started with me busting out of work and heading up the canyon to go camping with Kenzie and Christie. We laughed and sang and burned all the things in the fire and giggled whilst making jokes in our sleeping bags. Then woke up and spent the whole day playing in the pool and eating delicious barbecued things followed by Shakespeare in the park and a movie at Kenzie's apartment and lots of aloe Vera gel for our sun burned bodies! Kurtis got it the worst, poor guy. Sunday found us branching out and inviting marvelous men to dinner who kept us laughing for many hours till dessert night then discovery a friendship that has been in the making our whole lives was bonded in the love of musicals. Monday found me working from dawn till dusk then barbecuing into the late hours of the evening, celebrating a birthday with the most beautiful rendition of "happy birthday" ever to be presented and having a short visit from Jess Ziter from high school. We ended the night with some shameless flirting and Star Trek all sprawled on my couches. Which brings us to today and Kimmis bridal shower, tomorrow and pie night with some highly attractive men, Thursday with Linnea and reception setting up situations, Friday with the wedding of a most beloved cousin then a relief society retreat, Saturday with the second half of the retreat then a date with a most handsome Jonathan Hardy. Sunday will bring those highly attractive gentlemen back to my home and I'll never be in risk of being depressed again. I'm happy and blessed with business. 

I'd rather not

Yesterday I decided to drive for a couple hours around Utah lake, it was beautiful, but not in the way I was hoping for. It was wonderful to be on a road with no other people for the first time in a long time, I yelled and screamed and laughed and sang at the top of my lungs, it's good to let go, freeing somehow. As I was nearly done I received a text from a friend I've been avoiding so I figured it was high time to call him. We chatted for a bit and I fell right back into his charms. It's unfortunate how I have no staying power at all, one conversation and I'm planning our future again. It'll be alright, I'll figure it out. I also found out one of my best friends is in the hospital so we made fun cards with construction paper and crayons writing only with our left hands to take him when we visit him today. I hope he's entertained by how silly they are. It's no fun to be in a hospital, but maybe we can make it a little bit better for him. Poor thing. I also found out yesterday that they're having a Holbrook family reunion in Emmett, ID this weekend and I was just left out of the planning or inviting or anything. It's unfortunate, really that I'm not invited with my own family. I wish that were different. I'll work on that. 

Dumb dreams

I had a dream last night where I was telling Sarah Ezell how I missed Kelsey, but Kelsey was Christie in my dream and Braden came up to confess his love and it was confusing and not so much fun at all. And I just am tired and emotionally exhausted. I can do it, though. I'll be fine, it will all work out.

Missing

Something is missing and I'm mostly sure it's Braden. And Christie. And cold weather. And decent sleep. And my left shoe. And my desire to cook.
Combined these a raise quite the dilemma. I'll deal with them tomorrow, for now I should sleep and empty my mind of things of the world.
I am still missing those things however.

And then Siri

So there is the awesome feature on iPhone 4S that is called Siri, mostly you just ask it ridiculous questions and everything turns out funnier. I bought an iPhone 4S today and that has been happening all afternoon :) it's been a lovely day to be alive. I hope someone out there reads these posts and grins every so often because of how truly laughable my thoughts are. No, but really, I laugh at myself all the time. It keeps me young.

So you all know exactly how pathetic I am

I'm just not through loving him quite yet.
I was chatting with my mother and she asked me about the people in my life and when I mentioned a dumb boy she's heard a lot about she was taken by surprise and asked me why I allowed him to remain in my life and my simple answer was, "I'm just not through loving him quite yet" Which is true. I think we've got more Sunday dinners and more inside jokes, more dates and silly encounters, more laughing and more loving to do together before we're ready to go out on our own.
The thing that really gets me is how I can feel so at peace with him next to my side and when he's gone I just wish for him to be back again, but I know it's not that way for him. Unrequited love. What a terrible thing.