Tuesday, August 26, 2014

I read the Book of Mormon

I was debating putting my book down tonight because I had read a short chapter and called that good, but I couldn't decide if reading another was the route I should take. Then I realized if I'm going to be anywhere near ready for Devon to come home I've got to be better, I wanna get better. I want to be the kind of woman he would be proud to call his wife. I want to know that the Book of Mormon is true. I do know that it's true I just want to keep learning from it's pages and becoming the woman Heavenly Father would like me to be. And Devon, I want to be better for him. He deserves the best version of me I can possibly give him. I always want to be that version. 

Friday, August 22, 2014

If I keep these thoughts inside my head I'll explode

Christie got dumped. Golden is a lot of mean things I shouldn't say. He brought a date to the reception. Christie doesn't know. I don't know how to tell her. I wish I didn't know. We didn't go to the reception. She didn't need to see him today. I miss Devon always. I can't believe he means so much to my life. I wanted to cry today because I remembered things I thought were gone. I wanted to cry today. Maybe I will still cry. Christie is in the next bed and I can't cry. Being emotional is dumb. I want to be the best possible version of myself for Devon and for Christie and for me. I need to keep learning and growing so I'm not unfortunately behind when he comes home. I wish he were home. I wish he were holding me and making everything right. He always makes it right. Bad day, hold me. Rough moment, let me talk it through. Needs to study, let's me sit on the couch and read. I miss that. The companionship, how he loved me all the time even when I wasn't nice. Especially then. I feel so silly for not noticing our love story at the time. When you come home, please let me make it up to you. I will be better, I need to be. I wanna get better. 

Monday, August 18, 2014

One of these days

I have the pictures on my laptop. My laptop is in the carrying case, my carrying case is in a box, a box is in the garage. It's such a jumbled mess around here. Move-in day is in 6 days and I think we just might make it! Golden dumped Christie because he's a spineless hag. He's probably not, he's probably just scared, but aren't we all? Each day closer to Devon coming home takes a little of my breath away. What if I'm not the one for him? I've got some growing to do before he returns in 9 months. So let the countdown begin. Dear Devon, I'd marry you in a moment if you'd only ask :) 

Wednesday, July 23, 2014

Day 204: Striking my funny bone

I pushed the button. No sabotage ensued, unfortunately. It's been a crazy, busy, full and wonderful day! Mom gets here in an hour!!!! :) 

Day 203: I am so little, but I'm not small

These are situated all over the hospital to prevent accidents and traffic jams. I love them. They have helped me a time or two or eighteen. 

Day 202: Volleyball time!

Sunset pictures never do them justice. Especially one snapped from my iPhone camera while walking, but it is important nevertheless to take time to enjoy beautiful things. 

Day 201: Together Again

Christie came to snuggle with me before they left for church today. I love this woman. I think I'm coming out of my slump! I need to feel better and my mantra has been "I wanna get better" spending time with lots of good friends throughout the day today really helped.