And then I turn into this girl who's been in love with this guy since February

I have crazy dreams, I have dreams about people in my life, I have dreams about people I've never met, I have dreams about the characters in t.v. shows I watch, I make up what some of my friends parents would look like and I dream about them.
Last night I had a dream that I went to the Jerusalem center and professed my love to Braden, I told him I loved the way he has a sneaky glint in his eye when he thinks he's getting away with something, I told him I wanted to be the one he wants forever, I said something about having his 7 kids and always laughing. I brought up all these silly little things about our life together thus far and just laughed and cried and tried to choke it all out before I couldn't. I remember thinking about it on the plane and planning it all out before I got there then saying nothing that I had written down.
I woke up missing him so bad it physically hurts. I just want to bring him up in everything I do, I want to make sure everyone knows exactly how often I'm thinking of him (well, not really, that would be silly and highly annoying) I want to have that anticipation of if he's going to try to hold my hand when we go do something or if he's going to ask me on real dates. I want him to be here and it pains me that he is so far away having such marvelous experiences and I feel as though life has gone on here as regular. I love reading his blog, I unintentionally read it in his voice and laugh out loud with each post. He has such exuberance for life and it makes me want to be better and make happier choices for myself. I miss cooking for him, he gives the best compliments. He's sweet and awkward and snarky and a complete gentleman. The poor boy can't cook anything other than burritos. He loves Christie's apron and claims it for his own each time he's here.

This isn't making me feel any better, on the bright side it's been over 3 weeks which means There 3 months and some change before he's back stateside. Well actually, it's less than 3 months. He'll be back before Christmas, Merry Christmas to me!


Oh dear.